Life, Death, and What’s Left Behind

Tree3I guess there really is a part of me that still fears death. Not so much dying itself, but fear of the pain my loved ones would have to endure if I was no longer in this plane of existence. It is an unbearable thought that I would never want to put anyone through. With these thoughts brings questions. Is there really an end determined for each of us? And if there is, what’s the point of worrying about it? If you die by chance or because the universe has a plan for you, what difference does it make? I guess it’s really not so much about the end, but about the life that you leave behind and the impact that you make on the lives that you touch, that really matters. Death is just another expression of life. Without death, you could not have life. It’s like the inhale and exhale of the cosmos.

Lately I have been having new people appear in my life and others who have been reappearing. I am fortunate enough to be surrounded by caring people whom I love and who love me in return. I had to go through a transition of really shedding aspects of myself that were not in alignment with who I am. In doing so it created the room for people who really matter to come in into my life, or come back. By being honest with myself, I could in return be honest with those around me. Deepening the connection that we share with one another. Deeper connections bound together with compassion and understanding. When you allow yourself to be vulnerable and honest, the universe seems to reward you for your courage. It’s not always easy though…

The reason I mentioned that is because I lost a dear friend this weekend. I’m still caught in the wake confusion and sadness. Trying to comprehend the loss of someone you love is a very difficult and alien experience. I see now how everyone handles loss differently. At first I really tried to understand the reasoning behind this and how it is fair. I still don’t have a reason and in all honesty believe it is fair, but who said life is supposed to be? We all have different beliefs on what happens when someone passes. No one really knows what happens, but I suppose these beliefs are a way to ease the pain when someone is taken from this world. What remains is a void created by the collective awareness of those who have lost someone they love.

Some say that the universe, or God, has a plan for us all and when someone passes it is their time. I don’t know if I personally believe that. I do think that the universe provides for us in certain ways, but I think life is a little more of a gamble than that. When trying to come up with a reason, or something that makes this fair, I don’t see one. But I have found my own way of dealing with this loss. This reason of course differs from person to person. Everyone is entitled to a reason that helps them through these difficult times. I believe that in the wake of something tragic, the law of equivalent exchange leaves room for something positive. It brings loved ones together. It puts life into perspective. It makes you value the life that you have more, or maybe even for the first time. It shows us how valuable and fragile life is and the impact we can make when we cease to exist. It brings more attention to the way we treat others in our daily the interactions. Nothing in life is guaranteed, and that includes life itself. As cliche as it sounds, you never really know when the last time you will see someone will be, so make sure you let the people you care about know you care about them, and learn to forgive. You never know if it’s your loved ones last day on this earth, or even your own.

If you are suffering from a loss in your life, I’m sorry. I hope this helps you in some way.

Contorted Meditation #1

IMG_0074-0I’m beginning to realize I’ve never really known what it’s like to have gone into a deeper meditative state. Since I’ve been meditating every day for the past month with the assistance of an app called Headspace, I was finally able to follow along much easier with a guided meditation I’ve had for a while. Visualization came to me with much more ease. I didn’t find it hard to imagine the energy flowing through me, this time I could feel it. I could visualize the color of the energy and where it came from. At one point in the meditation I felt like my head and face were becoming contorted. They were becoming a strange feeling to me, almost as if I were feeling them for the first time, not able to fully comprehend the feeling of their existence.

Later in the meditation my arms and hands felt like they were being forced onto my body by an external force. My mind began to go into fear mode. I began worrying my bones were going to be broken as I was compacted more and more into myself. I reminded myself I was in control and that thought was ridiculous. Slowly I turned my attention back to the meditation. I then began to enjoy this feeling of pressure and uncertainty. I didn’t try to impose anything onto the meditation. The less I try to understand, the more I feel I do.

I’m at a point in my life where I don’t know what I believe. I’m trying to be as open as I possibly can. When I refer to energy flowing through me, I’m seeing it in my mind and creating a feeling within myself. I don’t know if this is an external force that I allowed access into my body, or if it’s purely self-contained. I don’t think the focus should be so much on where it comes from, but on the positive effects it has on your mind.

For those of you who have not heard of Headspace, I highly recommend this app. It’s an easy to follow meditation guide that really helps with getting you into meditation and deepening your understanding of it. It takes meditation and puts it into easy to understand terms. Even if you’re experienced, it still has much to offer. Here is their link if you’re interested in checking it out. www.headspace.com

Please feel free to share your thoughts and experiences. I’m still learning and would like to hear opinions of others, especially if they don’t coincide with mine. Thanks for reading!

It’s Nothing Personal

IMG_0073At some point in our lives we have all had someone who’s pissed us off to no extent, or hurt us deeply. And if you haven’t, I don’t believe you. People are able to make us feel amazing. They can also make us feel as though our bodies have lost all their heat.

It’s unfortunate how much control over our emotions we give to other people from time to time, or maybe even all the time. People we may not even have respect for. When someone’s opinion effects me emotionally, I usually try to ask myself some questions. Does what they’re saying have some truth to it? Is this something I’m holding resistance towards that needs to be worked on? Is this someone I would come to for advise? Is what they’re saying intended to hurt me? Sometimes I’m able to overcome these negative emotions, sometimes I ignore the answer.

Another thing to remember is they’re not you. They will never be able to fully see things from your point of view and feel the emotions they put you through. The same goes for how you perceive their point of view and what you think they’re going through. We have all had different pasts and learned different information in many different ways. What’s true for you won’t always be true for someone else. There’s a quote by Dita Von Teese that has always stuck with me, “You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, but there will always be someone who hates peaches.”

The best thing to realize is we are all human. We don’t always know why people do the things they do, and sometimes there really is no rhyme or reason. The best thing you can do is forgive and forget. Forgive them for being human, we are all flawed creatures. Forget about the things that have been said that serve you no purpose. We do have the ability to change the things in our power, as well as accept and let go of the things that aren’t. You just need to make that decision.

Bottom line is you decide what you will accept and what you will not. It’s up to you to decide when action is needed and when it serves no purpose. Punching someone in the nose is not always the best plan of action. If you know something is right and you’ve come to this conclusion by looking at it objectively, then it most likely is. You’ll never know unless you try.

Life is short and there are infinite possibilities to love and let go. Life is hard enough without the help of others. Don’t forget to cut yourself some slack. Sometimes there is no right anwser. The worst thing you can do, is nothing.

I welcome any comments that agree or disagree. I’m always looking to expand my awareness. Thanks for reading!

Change: The act or instance of making or becoming different.

GiantLeap-2Hello my fellow fellows. I’m pretty sure I say this in every post, but It’s been awhile since I’ve written anything and it’s about time I got back with the program. I read and read, watch videos, peruse blogs and websites, but I still get left with that feeling of lack in my personal development and the development of my life.

I’ve been trying to do what everyone else says or thinks I should do for so long, but using my voice to think it was me who was saying it. I wasn’t truly doing what I wanted to do and I wasn’t allowing myself to feel the way I should.. There comes a certain time when you need to really take what you’ve learned and apply it to your life. You may have a “life high” for a bit after reading a good personal development book, but how long does that really last?

I’ve been steadily taking what I’ve learned and applying it to my life for what feels like a long period, but in the grand scheme of things it really hasn’t been that long. I am now really starting to see a steady difference in the quality of my life and I’m starting to better understand what the hell everyone was talking about. I’ve slowly been making changes to benefit me at the present moment and making changes that will benefit me in my future.

So alas, I have created a new blog.. I felt like it was time to make a new blog that was better geared toward the new direction I want to go in, which really isn’t that much different, but it feels that way to me. I would love for you to follow my new blog because I have grown to know appreciate many of my followers like friends in the “real world”. So please follow my new blog (steadywisdom.wordpress.com) so I can follow all of you back because I haven’t yet found the FOLLOW ALL button on this blog. Thank you so much for reading and I hope all is well.

Thanks Again!

Clint

Going With the Flow

Palm tree at Hostel Pangea

Palm tree at Hostel Pangea in San Jose, Costa Rica

Right now I’m sitting here, staring at my computer, wanting to write something. I tried working on a post that I had started writing awhile back, but I wasn’t getting anywhere with that.  So I thought, what the hell, I’m just going to babble on about some of my recent experiences that some might find interesting.

For those of you who haven’t read any of my prior posts, my name is Clint. I am big on personal development, but have a LONG way to go. I too go through my ups, downs, lefts, and rights. I have no idea where I’m going in life or what it is I really want to do. I just know that I want to be happy, healthy, love and be loved. I’m sure that there are many of you that will agree and many that will disagree.

I recently just got back from a wonderful trip to Costa Rica. It was AMAZING. I didn’t get sick, I didn’t get mugged, I didn’t end up on the next episode of locked up abroad, and I didn’t spend all of the little money I had before I got back. So with all that said, the trip was a success! I saw the most beautiful beaches, the most beautiful scenery, the most beautiful waterfalls, and I’m fairly certain I saw my future ex wife as well.. My friends and I drove all over the country and experienced more than I could have imagined in just a weeks time. The only thing I did lose down there was sleep, lots and lots of sleep, but it was well worth it!

Man sized brews. i'm on the left.

Man sized brews, I’m on the left.

Nauyaca Waterfalls

Nauyaca Waterfalls

I’m not rich, I work a full-time job, I don’t travel often, but I always leap at the opportunity to do so. Before I left I wasn’t unhappy, but I wasn’t living my life to the fullest I could either. Sometimes getting out of your little bubble of repetition, doing the same thing over and over again every single day, is all you need to get your life back into perspective. There is so much out there that we have no idea about because we’re stuck in our comfort zones. Sometimes we need to rattle the cage and shake it up a bit. Do things you want to do that you know you probably shouldn’t, be weird, be sporadic, takes chances, man up. Take control of your life, don’t let your life take control of you. Everyone thinks they’re going to live forever, they’re not. I know it sounds cliché, but life is short! Too short not to do the things you want to do, with the people you want to do them with.

Puntarenas

Puntarenas, Costa Rica

Well that’s where going with the flow on the post took me so I hope you enjoyed it. Thanks for reading and if you have anything to add-on or just say, have at it!

I hope all is well,

Clint

Three Ways to Jump Out of the Rut

45Eye

We all have times in life when we get stuck in a rut. When you’re in this rut mode it can last for a day or even months. Life is filled with its ups and downs so you’re always going to have a down eventually.  Luckily there are ways to pull yourself back up!

1. Exercise your gratitude

Often times when you’re in a down you lose sight of what you have in this life and what you are thankful for. Instead, you may be and a mindset of having a “lack of” and focusing on what you don’t have. It’s always good to remind yourself of all the great things in your life so you feel complete and fulfilled. Here is a post I did on exercising your gratitude.

2. Be Present 

The only thing that truly exists is the here and the now. Your past has already happened so the only place it exists is in your thoughts. The future hasn’t happened yet so 9 times out of 10 you won’t know how it’s going to turn out. Learn to accept the present moment as it is and deal with it the best you can. Once you accept everything the way it is, it will help you to become more at peace and will cause less turmoil in your life. Here is a post that goes further into living in the past, future, and present.

3. Breathe!

By simply breathing and focusing on your breath you will bring yourself into the present moment and away from your thoughts. Taking deep breaths activates you parasympathetic system. The parasympathetic nervous system is what regulates your glands and organs to bring you body into it’s relaxed state. So by taking deep breaths your calming and relaxing your entire system, which in turn relaxes your mind.  Another great way to attain this is through meditation.

These are just three easy ways but there are so many others! There are all sorts of resources online, books you can read, and activities you can do. If you’re in a rut and you make a conscious effort to bring yourself out of it, you will find a way.

I got the inspiration for this post from Motivation of the Deep by Green Embers! Thanks for reading, I hope it helped!

 

 

 

Life Reflection.

Moon-cold-lake-reflections

“Your life is a reflection of yourself. If you want to change your life you need to first change yourself. Imagine your life as a reflection in the mirror, you can’t get your reflection to smile without smiling first.” -Clint Dunham

Thought Mold.

Awesome pjoto

Do you ever feel sorry for yourself? Do you ever feel like you want people to feel sorry for you? If you are feeling sorry for yourself, sometimes you want other people to feel sorry for you as well. The only time you want people to feel sorry for you is when you already feel sorry for yourself, and you are looking for validation through others. When things get tough you need to focus on not feeling sorry for yourself. Everyone has adversities that challenge them from time to time. Learn to deal with it and not let it take you to a point of self-pity. If you are feeling sorry for yourself there is a situation that arose and needs to be dealt with. It’s not someone else’s responsibility it’s yours.

More often than not it’s easier just to evade the truth or solution, but in the long run it’s just going to make things harder. If you know you really need to do it, whatever “it” may be, quit making up excuses and stopping yourself, just do it. A task begun is a task half done. Learning to take action and responsibility for your life is of the utmost importance. Like it or not, life isn’t just going to lie itself out the way you want it to if you’re lazy and don’t do anything about it. Just because you don’t want to do something doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t.

This article came to me on one of those nights where I lost all control of my mind, you know the nights when it feels like you have 20 television stations playing simultaneously in your brain? Well with that usually comes digging deeper and deeper into your thoughts, but not in a good way. As bad as it was at the time I did still benefit from it. I was thinking negative thoughts or thoughts that I found to be negative at that moment. I soon discovered that they weren’t negative thoughts per say, but thoughts that I added a negative twist to. The reason I found them to be negative was because they were truths or solutions that I molded into something different in order to evade them, thus creating a negative attachment to them. This in turn caused me inner turmoil. We human beings have a great system for shaping thoughts and feelings a certain way so that we are able to avoid them. Most of which mainly happens at a subconscious level, so we’re usually not even aware that we are doing it.

Black thoughts

Just because the truth or solution isn’t what we want to hear, just because we may have to work hard to overcome it, doesn’t mean it’s not the right thing to do. Instead of fighting these thoughts, finding ways to dismiss them as being false or not real (which in some cases that might be true), try to understand them and figure out where they stem from. Learn to take a step back and view them in a detached way so that you can decide whether it’s a thought that is useless and only causes a negative response, or if it is in fact a thought with truth in it that has been molded in a way so that you can avoid it. Thoughts should flow easily through your mind, you are not your thoughts, therefore they should not control you. If you have a prominent reoccurring negative thought, by rooting to the bottom of it and discovering where it stems from, you’re not only alleviating yourself from that thought, but growing a deeper understanding of yourself in the process as well.

color person

As I have been progressing in my personal development and I guess you could say my “life” development, I have discovered so much about myself and everything else that I couldn’t have even imagined before. Pandora’s box has officially been opened. The more I learn, the less I realize I know. It can be exhilarating, stressful, overwhelming, empowering, shocking, frustrating, and even awe-inspiring. At times it is really hard to see how far you have come or even if you’ve come any further at all. It can get a little discouraging. There are always battles with my thoughts, beliefs, and emotions. I attribute that to my transformation mentally and as a human being. But one thing I do know for sure, is that it is a constant battle of improvement and making myself a better person every day. No one said life was easy, but just because it’s not easy doesn’t make it bad. The obstacles that challenge us and are sometimes hard to overcome, are what make life so interesting. It’s how we grow and learn to become the best person we can.

You’re not the judge.

life

Too often we judge others by the way they lead their lives. Their life is theirs, not yours. All people go about doing things differently than others and shouldn’t be judged for it. So the next time you find yourself judging someone else, just know you have no idea how they feel or what they’ve gone through. What’s not to say you would be doing the same thing if you were in their situation?

“Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.” –  Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

Happy 2013 Everyone!

It has certainly been some time since I’ve been on the blogsphere. I would like to start off this post by wishing everyone a Happy New Year and I hope all is well in your world! Too often I find myself getting stuck in my little bubble of what I consider life. I feel it’s always nice to get a little reminder of how little your problems really are in the grand scheme of things from time to time. So I’ve taken the photos I’ve shared on my Facebook fan page to share with you! I hope you enjoy them and have a great New Year!!

Clint

Please Share Your Knowledge!

First, I would like start off this post by saying THANK YOU to everyone who has read, followed, commented and liked my blog! My personal growth and developement has sky rocketed ever since I started this blog, and it’s thanks to all of you!

Everything has been going great and my blog has progressed much faster than I had imagined, but I feel I would like to take it to the next level. Since I’m still very new to this, I would love to hear some suggestions, ideas, or really anything that you think would help. I mean I could just go read different articles online, which I have, but I would enjoy hearing and learning from like minded people. Also, I recently created a fan page on Facebook, so any likes or suggestions on that would be much appreciated as well!

I hope all is going well for you!

Clint

Belief over Doubt.

It has just recently just passed my 21st year of existence on this place we call earth. I guess the only thing that really felt different the next day was this horrible, dreadful, evil thing we call a hangover… If I were to think back about when I started my journey of personal and spiritual growth, I would say it was about two years ago. It’s amazing how far you can come and how much you can learn, just to resort back to square one. Someone told me the other day it’s amazing how day by day everything seems to remain the same, but when we look back a year, it’s as if everything has changed.

I read an awesome post that explains how personal growth and self-realization is not an easy path, but a path that is always challenging and always putting you outside of your comfort zone (I’ll post the link below). For some reason I have always imagined this certain point I would reach in my development, to where it would just be smooth sailing from there on. By reading that post it really have put into perspective that it’s really not the case at all, not one bit. It’s a rocky ass road, but totally worth it!

It’s sooooooo easy to forget what you have learned, all you can really do is be aware of what is currently unfolding in your life, and you do your best to keep in mind what you have learned. What more can you do than doing your best? There is a point you think you will get to in your life that is created in your mind, or certain way you think everything will unfold in your future. This is based on past experiences and beliefs that you have molded, and believe to be true.

When you start to discover the truth in life, you can tend to doubt and question what the truth really is. This is all part of expanding, growing, and breaking out of your shell. You really want to belive what you’re experiencing is true, but you have this looming doubt that you just cant break free of. You want to believe in the worst way, but it’s as if that voice in the back of your head won’t let you. Well my friend, just like anything else, it takes patience and determination to overcome this poisonous feeling of doubt. This post came to me as I laid in bed staring at the ceiling, questioning everything, including myself. Usually this feeling of doubt would slightly overcome the feeling of what I believe to be true, but not this time.

What is the truth you ask? It’s whatever you current belief is or whatever you believe that leads to your happiness and fulfillment. This will always differ from person to person. If you believe in something enough and you have some doubt about it, keep on believing! Your doubt will soon subside and your belief will shine through. This world can rain down hard on you and dampen your spirit, if you let it. So if you just take a stand within in yourself, and you come to the agreement that the world is no longer going to experience you, but you are going to experience the world, you are going to free yourself from all the binds that are holding you back from doing and being the person you could become. It’s time to take a stand and let your beliefs blow your doubt out of the water.

http://www.wakeupcloud.com/truths-about-personal-growth/

Live, Love, Die

I have recently been trying to understand the concept of living your life as if you’re going to die tomorrow. I think it is something that cannot be understood right off the bat, but something you have to let set in. I have recently read a book call the “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz which I think that he explains it wonderfully. Now I don’t remember what he said word for word, but I’ll explain what I got from it.

Everyone lives there lives as if there are going to live for a very long time, which is just not the case. Death can be looming around any corner, but it shouldn’t be taken as something negative. Death is just a part of life, there can be no life without death. What really matters is the way that you “view” life and death. Just like anything else in life, you can look at it however you want to. It’s all what you think, because your reality is different from everyone else’s, and no two realities can ever be the same. So why not make it a good one?

If you were to live your life as if you were to die tomorrow, you will be living life to it’s fullest. You will express your love to everyone you care about, and even someone you don’t know for that matter, because you know you may not be able to do it again. You will do all kinds of fun things just because you know you may not have the chance to do them tomorrow. You won’t spend half your time worrying about what’s going to happen next or stressing about tomorrow because you will be so focused on the present moment. Life is not meant to be spent living in fear of what could happen next, life is meant to love and experience everything to its fullest.

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” Mahatma Gandhi

Thanks for reading, I hope that it helped you in any way. If you have anything to say or to add on, I would love to hear!

I hope all is well!
Clint

Secret about Secrets.

Secret- Something that is kept or is meant to be kept unknown or unseen by others.

Is keeping a secret wrong, or can it be a good thing? It really all falls in the eyes of the beholder, or what the secret is regarding I suppose. Secrets have always existed, some are to keep certain knowledge safe from getting into the wrong hands, some are selfish and are created from wrong doing.

It takes two or more people to create a secret, and it is their outlook on the secret that determines whether or not it is “good” or “bad”. If the keeper of the secret feels that it is wrong, it can be very damaging and self-destructive to hold onto.  If you feel that you are holding onto a secret for the wrong reason, you should reveal it before it causes too much damage. Like Gloria Steinman said. “The truth will set you free, but first it’s going to piss you off.” You need to first learn to forgive yourself for anything that has happened in the past. The past no longer exists, the only thing that exists is the present moment. Learn to forgive yourself and let go, only then will you be able to find peace within yourself.

If you have a secret, deep down you know if it’s a secret that needs to be kept, or one that needs to be released. The longer you wait, the more damaging it can become not only for the one who bears the secret, but to whom the secret effects as well. On the other hand if the secret is kept for the well-being of others, then by all means, lock it up!

I hope that what I have said has helped you in any way. Sometimes learning to take a step back and taking a look at the big picture can help put things into perspective. If you have any questions or comments to add on I would love to hear them!

I hope all is well!

Clint

It’s Been Awhile…

So this is to all my fellow blogging friends, followers, and readers. In these last couple months there have been a lot of changes in my life. I wouldn’t say I was in a dark place, but I guess you could say there has been some over cast. It’s amazing how much you can know and learn and still feel like you end up back at square one. I have started a new chapter in my life and I wasnt accepting the change like I have now learned to do. You don’t realize how hard change can be until it happens. Leaving your comfort zone really is very uncomfortable, but things will always get better if you can just accept them and move on with your life. It’s been quite some time since my last post, but I am going to work hard to keep at it because this has been truly rewarding for me. I hope all is well in your life and if not, it will get better if you let it. I promise!

I recently just ran across a poem that I wrote in highschool that I would like to share with you as well. I hope you enjoy it!

LOVE IS A GARDEN

Love is a garden

You never know how it will turn out

Unless you really care and put out

You may have to give it water

So use your head and be a little smarter

It can sometimes get hot and dry

So be sure not to let it fry

You can always expect weeds to sprout

So give them a good pull and rip them out

Sometimes the dirt can harden

So always treat your love like a garden

Greyed Kaleidoscope

Everyone has their own opinion on this thing we call life. This view on life differs from person to person. People see their own life based off the experiences they have encountered on their journey. That said, no one will have the same exact view, not one person was brought up the same exact way as the other. They may come extremely close, but they will never be exactly the same.

We are all faced with important decisions, or decisions that seem important at the time, in some point in our lives. We should never let other’s opinions hinder our decision. We should always take into account someone’s opinion, because it may be the right thing for you to do, but it also may not. You should always go with you own assumption, but be OPEN to the assumption of others. They are not you, they don’t know everything you do, and they haven’t experienced everything you have, but keep in mind, it goes both ways. Everyone on this earth knows something that you do not, therefore everyone on this earth has something they can teach you.

More times than not, people get sucked into doing things the “Right Way”, meaning what everyone ELSE feels is the right way. Don’t mold your perception to fit the needs of others. To me, most everyone starts out as a kaleidoscope of colors. Pretty soon, some one will say one of the colors in your scope would look better grey. Pretty soon, more and more will come along and say the same thing about all of the other colors. What’s left is a grey outlook on life, and it’s on the next.

So I guess what I’m trying to get across, is to keep your colors and stay vibrant! Just because everyone else sees grey, doesn’t mean you have as well. Listen to people who can give you more color, not to those who can take it away. Be and do whatever it is you want, regardless of what the “Right Way” is.

Thanks for reading I hope you enjoyed it. If you have anything to add on I would love to hear!

Thanks again,

Clint

The Art of Art (Preview)

Art comes in the form of any shape, size, color, sound, location, or really anything you could imagine. Art is infinite and ever-changing. The limitations of art really all boils down to is the creator or Artist. When you observe or experience someones art, it’s as if you’re seeing the artist’s perception of reality. You can really see that person for who they really are, through their artistic creations.

So this is actually just a preview on an article I am currently working on. I hope you enjoy this little snidbit of what’s to come. It’s still in the process, so I would love to hear what you think of it so far, or what your outlook is.

Thank you again so much for reading!

Clint